silent lately

Lately I've been away from blogging again...yet once more here I am writing again. I've been searching, soul searching to who and what I am. What I'm meant to be, who I'm meant to be. I guess it's soul searching.  I've turned off my humanity for a while and when I opened my eyes I saw what a terrible being that made me fir that moment when I stop caring about consequences. I get the feeling of freedom and relief when I'm in that state but at the same time those that are closest to me suffer more than what I do. When I came back in came back to my senses everything change for me everything was different everything came down harder and stronger than me. When I felt it it was setting I felt so many emotions it was strange to me no one would really understand what that's like maybe or perhaps there are people that do and then there are people who will read this and think wow that lady's crazy. But things happen that happened now I'm realizing I know I am meant to be something greater and I will be something great, a force not to be reckoned with and people will learn that, others will learn that, I will learn that. Well then I guess I'll keep searching. For now I'm the rule breaking illuminati princess because I refuse to be bound by laws outside my own. I believe in a new world order,  MY new world order and it will come. I will rise above my expectations and bring those who wish to rise up with me. I will ascend to the correct status of goddess. When I do it will be the greatest moment of my life.... end self rant real world problems coming soon! ;)